The Bible Makes Me Happy.


I know, not a title one expects to see on a page called “The AntiTheist” yet its true none the less. There are, I think, perfectly valid reasons why the bible and indeed all of the other “holy” books should make all non-theists happy.

The holy books, with all their nonsensical claims, factual inaccuracies, and historical half truths make me very happy, and very glad. I can say that for this reason: The nonsense of the various texts gives me comfort BECAUSE it is so patently untrue, so obviously fabricated by men in order to dominate and control other men. This comforts me because if the “holy” books were more credible we might actually have to consider as a feasible possibility that there might be an omni-powerful, omni-present overseer looking down on us and judging our smallest actions and most ethereal thoughts according to its own hidden, confusing, and often contradictory requirements.

If any of the books were more believable we’d have to take as a serious possibility the idea that perhaps we were in fact created to be the grateful slaves of an all-powerful master who designed us with no other purpose than to worship and adore it. We would have to consider the possibility that there is a force in the universe so grand and powerful that it could design and create all of existence from nothing at all, meticulous enough to see to the billions of calculations and various fine tunings necessary to make the universe happen, and yet insecure enough to need us to love it absolutely, without qualm or question, and petty enough to punish us eternally for our failure in said devotion.

Properly read, the Bible is the most potent force for atheism ever conceived.

There’s another aspect of the “holy” books that should make us non-theists very happy. It is engendered by the above quote from Isaac Asimov. How many of us came to our current lack of belief due to either a study of the text, or simply through considering the unlikelihood of the stories we’re told from those texts? Humanity is a more rational, logically minded people than it’s ever been in its history.  That fact combined with the genuine knowledge we now possess about the realities of the world and the universe and the sheer superstitious mysticism throughout the ancient texts makes me hopeful. It gives me reason to believe that more and more people will be able reach past their tradition, culture and social conventions and actually consider what they profess to believe, to see their way free of the flower bedecked chain of theology.

The bible makes me happy because I honestly believe that an objective unemotional study of the text itself is the best case that can possibly be made against the veracity, morality or societal benefit of the claims it makes. This position is equally valid for the various other “holy” books as well. The books themselves are the best weapon atheists, antitheists and other non-theists could possibly have against theological preaching, moralizing and justification.




Posted on September 25, 2012, in Bible, Editorial, Religion and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Now if only we could get believers to read their own book. Instead of having atheists read it for them and point out all these happy contradictions.

    • I agree entirely, but the part that really infuriates and confuses me is the theists who know their book intimately and refuse to see the various nonsenses, atrocities and contradictions. Thanks for reading and commenting.

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